Q:Whats yellow and white and sits at the bottom of a pool? A: A baby with slashed floaties Q:Whats red and gory and sits at the top of a pool? A: Floaties with a slahed baby

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What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin sons? Nothing, his wife had an abortion.

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Jesse uses a prescription shampoo called " greasey poop" because he feels like his hair doesnt look greasy enough. He cries himself asleep every night because he wants a slim body like the rest of the cool kids, so he eats his pain away, which digs him an even deeper hole. the life of Jesse zigenbein is quite tragic to say the least. Please donate 10$ to the "eat ourselves to sleep" campaign

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Why did the serial killer need the knife? He needed to butter his bread

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What's blue, orange, and silver all over? Nothing. That's a ridiculous combination of colors.

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Your name is Fired, your Boss comes up to you and says "Your Fired" You say "I know my name." Your boss gets mad and throws you in a chimney

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That awkward moment when you get in the van and there's no candy.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Mom. Mom who? SHUT THE F**K UP AND OPEN THE DOOR!!!

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The KKK, got any blacks?

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Why was Joe afraid of Steve? Because Steve raped and killed all of Joe's three children two weeks ago.

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What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

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roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

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Q: Why was little Timmy afraid of clowns? A: The one at his birthday party killed his parents.

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Why is the dog in the driver seat? Why is there birds making you filet mignon? Why is your toe blue? I don't know the answer. Go talk to your doctor

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Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

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Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

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Why are AntiJokes so funny? Because your brain analyses them and makes you laugh.

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How do u kill a gay man? Shoot him in the head

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What's the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? What's the WNBA?

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Your mama's so fat.... Her cerial bowl came with a lifeguard

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what does the doctor do when he tells you you have aids? he laughs and says "hahahahahhaha sucks for you, i dont!"

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how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

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Why is the sky blue? Because it isn't red.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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