I want some pudding. but I didn't have my meat. how can I have pudding?

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Where does Charlie Sheen buy his clothes? Winners

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Why did The white man loose his black friend? Because he ran away.

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If Santa and a Blonde woman jump off a building who hits the ground 1st? They both do due to Galileo's discovery of two objects with different masses but similar densities hit the ground at the same time.

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Why couldn't the journal cross the street? Because there was a red light.

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What did the chicken say when it layed the square egg? Ouch.

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Scrooge McDuck dives headfirst into his pool of gold coins... He breaks his neck from the impact of the landing and dies.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

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Whats worse then any minority? The fact they still exist.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a paraplegic? A paraplegic doesn't walk out on his family

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

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Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Two in the front, three in the back, and 278 in the ash tray/\.

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a young mother cow died in a street crossing by a large oil truck, she was never buried and became infested with maggots in the next few days

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There once was a boy walking over a railroad track. He got hit by a train. He died.

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wat do u call a person who is ugly ugly

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Q: Why are pine trees green? A: Because of the green pigments in the leaves known as chlorophyll which are used to capture sunlight.

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A man goes to his doctor and asks: ""What is wrong with me doc? One moment I think I am a teepee, the next moment I a, a wigwam." To which the doctor responds: "I have told you several times sir; you have stage IV pancreatic cancer."

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There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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A baby walks into a bar and the bartender says.... Where is your mom?

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What did the bullet say to Bin-Laden? Suck it

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Your mama is so fat, we are all seriously concerned about her health.

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Q. Where's your nan???? A. In my closet

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A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops