why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

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Id like to apologize for the one below (near the end yeah at the very end yeah that near you fuck!) When I said I give candy to etc etc I did mean I do not give candy to... Well... Nothing male, and I do not apologize, thank you. Shortie: Me as a Sociopath vs Sociopath with faster gunplay: So A Sociopath moved into my neighborhood, he arrived at my place and said hey you? You the sociopa... "BOOM" Moral: Shoot first, listen later... And if you hear something keep shooting... Anyway that was not the Sociopath but I got him eventually.

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Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

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There is a hawk and a squirrel sitting in a tree. a farmer walks by with a strange package so the hawk turns to the squirrel and says nothing because he is an animal and incapable of speech, he then eats the squirrel because he is a bird of prey.

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What noise does a Chinese roller coaster make? Chink Chink Chink Chink chink.....

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How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

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What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

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What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

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Why did Steve Jobs die? Because he had cancer

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I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

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What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

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What's worst than being stung by a bee? being stung by two bees. what's worst than that? The Holocaust. What's worst than that? being stung by three bees.

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Q: Why did princess Diana crops the road? A: Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Why was the dog barking? Because I lit him on fire.

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How many people are in the world? More than one. -David Papile

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I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is a serial rapist and has been harrassing six for months.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

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Why was the man white? Because he wasn't black. All credit goes to Caravel.

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What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

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When is the only time you see a Mexican and Black person driving together ? When they feel like it .

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Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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