Man: Am i going to be alright? Doctor: No, you're going to die.

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Two guys walk into a bar. They are knocked out and rushe to hospital because the bar was metal.

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What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

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How do you make a dog say meow? Freeze it and put it through a woodchipper. (MEROWRRRR)

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Three black men walk into a gas station and don't steal anything.

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Why did the bus driver tell the black man to get to the back of the bus? Because all the seats up front were full and its dangerous to stand in a moving vehicle

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What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

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Why couldn't Billy see the show? Because Billy is blind.

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

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Why did the girl fall off the stage? Someone shot her.

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How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

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A bartender walks into a bar. I know what you're thinking. You think he works there but that is not correct. He works at a different bar. Anyways, he buys a few drinks and leaves. He was impressed with the service.

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What are the differences between a black man and a park bench? One's a chair and ones a person.

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Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

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An old friend of mine had an idea. "Socks, but for your hands." I laughed until the day I heard he died of chaffed penis.

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A jew walked out of a bar then goes to the other bar across the street then walks out from the back door to go to another bar The Actions of this jew tells us that there are only 3 bars in the zone and one pet shop

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What's funnier than 10 dead babies? 11 dead babies.

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Why didn't the man give a location of the murderer? He was murdered

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Why was the clown sad? Because he was found guilty of raping and murdering 33 young men, and sentenced to death for 12 of those murders by a jury of his piers.

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There's a study that the population of Americans are very high in America.

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What do you call a fridge painted red and brown? A fridge.

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Why was the teenage girl bleeding from her vagina? Because I had shot her in her vagina with my gun earlier that day.

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knock knock who's there boo boo who why are you crying it's just a joke

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A man takes his girlfriend ice skating on a lake. As they are ice skating she says "we should go back home and fu..." At this point they fall through a thin spot on the ice and they both drown in the lake. Fish ate their dead bodies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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