What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

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Why couldn't the black guy support his family? He was only 3 years old.

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How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not. Sally..

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

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Q: Why did the Asian fail his driving test? A: Lack of concentration on the road and low knowledge of functioning a car.

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why was the boy sad? his bellybutton hurt

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Apple hates Blackberry.

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What did the red bag have written on it? Yellow bag

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Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

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Did you hear about the kid from Oklahoma? No. Yeah, he died.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Well, to tell you the truth, I think that the chick-fa-lea came first.

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Why does Rebecca Black like Friday? Because it's the start of the weekend

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what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

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Koolaid is red, Poweraid is blue, Gatorade is yellow, My urine is brown... looks like i have a bladder infection.

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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What's eighteen inches long, stiff, and makes women scream at night? A twelve inch long penis that is erect, thus adding approximately one half of its flaccid size, and involved in the act of fornication with the female partner of the man whose penis I am describing. (Of course, it is ignorant and juvenile to assume that the man in question is heterosexual. He may be a homosexual, which is perfectly acceptable in these liberal times we live in, or he may in fact be single and not inclined towards a sexual preference of any kind. This is understandable due to the myriad complications of long-term relationships, a result of the infinite differences between the masculine and feminine psyches.)

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whats bad about being black and jewish they have to sit in the back of the oven

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What rhymes with milk...milf

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roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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Do you know what one golf ball said to the other? Nothing they are lifeless objects

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A man walks into a bar. After recovering, he sues the bar for it's irregular glass doors.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It escaped.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? An obsession with what motivates a chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops