What do you call an horse? A horse, because horse does not start with a vowel and that would be grammatically incorrect.

What's brown and sticky? Some brown pigment mixed with something sticky like glue.

Q: Why did the Honey Badger cross the road? A: Honey Badger don't care!!!

Knock, Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting c- Moo

Why is Justin bieber gay? Because he is atracted to men

Why do dead Republicans float? Their corpse's mass-to-volume ratio is less than the water they displace. It is very sad.

knock knock. who's there? 9/11

How can you tell if someone is a global warming alarmist? Their IQ on average is 10 points below normal

Ok everyone, you know that kid that after his joke he'll put louis on the bottom because that's his name? He sucks at joke telling and if you see any of his jokes, DISLIKE THEM!

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

Why are black people so good at basketball? Because they practise.

Why did the bird fall out of the sky? Someone shot it.

Why was the man denied access to the college Because he did not have good grades in the past.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one says "Boy, it sure is hot in here." The second one says "Holly shit! A talking muffin!" As muffins generally don't talk.

A construction worker walks into a bar. Lucky he was wearing his hard hat.

Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

What did Harold homeless man get for his Birthday? after several years of a meth abuse Harold lost contact with his family. As a result Harold received nothing but an extra bowl of soup at his local soup kitchen.

Roses are red, Violets are red, I have a dead body, What do I do.

Justin Beiber has fame, his own bodyguards, he has performed many shows and has everyone's attention. What do you have? A penis.

I have 20 dollars and 27 cents. How much money do I have? 20.28$ I found a penny.

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

What's blue and invisible ? Nothing.... Its impossible to be iinvisible and a color

If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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