Why did Teresa fall off the swing? She had no arms. Who is knocking at the door? Not Teresa.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

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A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

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"Knock Knock" "Just ring the bloody bell for once!"

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Thankgiving Jimmy: I'm thankful for my family Thomas: I'm thankful for shelter Jake: I'm thankful for running over babies

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What do you call a seedless pumpkin? A pumpkin.

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god sent down his only son, " his only son." so in gods eyes we are a bunch of girls.

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Why did the black man eat the fried chicken? He was hungry

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

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want to hear a yo mama joke sure Your dad

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A White, Black, Hispanic, and an Asian man are stranded on a deserted island. They become best friends, proving race should not be a divisive factor in any community.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I've just bought a chainsaw, and I will now decapitate you.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

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You know what's funny? You can't spell manslaughter without laughter.

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Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive hair traits.

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How many children does it take to kill a homocidal killer? None. Children should not attempt such a dangerous task.

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What did the alcoholic tell his son? Don't do meth.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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Q: What did a rock say to a Another Rock? A: Don't take things for Granite!

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So a man walks into a bar with a monkey. I forgot the rest of this joke, but your mom is a whore.

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Q: Why was the chicken waterboarded? A: Because the guy liked being cruel to animals.

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1:Your reading my text. 2:Your wondering what the point is. 3:Your getting angry. 5:Your going to click thumbs down. 6:But wait! You didn't realize that there was no number 4. 7:Your checking it. 9:Your smiling. 10:Your smiling so much you forgot to check for number 8. 11:Your checking it. 12:Jokes on you.

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Gregory: Hey, aren't you that pretty girl I saw from the party? Jenny: Huh? Gregory: No wait, it can't be you. Because you are WAY prettier. Jenny: Aw, that's so sweet, lemme give you my phone number. Gregory: Okay I'm ready to copy Jenny: It's 1-800-get-a-life-loser Gregory: Biitch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops