How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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what did I say to myself nothing because its very weird to talk to your self

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Q:Whats the difference between NBC and the NBA? A: The NBA is the National Basketball Assocation and NBC is The No Body Cares.

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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why was there a fish in a fish tank ? because if it wasnt it would die

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Did you hear about Phil in accounting? No? Well he was trying to make a new type of car. He took the seats from a ford engine from a dodge, and the frame from a toyota. Do you know what he got? 5 years in jail.

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Woah, I mean if I was not like super high right now, I would totally hate you for that, you are what we call a charming asshole Nero, you can do that kinda stuff and completely get away with it, I feel like I should be really ashamed... So like does it work on everybody reading this? That would be wack, so much fun to do that.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A catfish could never pass the LSAT because it is unable to perform high-level critical thinking.

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question: why did the dog whine? answer: Because it wanted the freakin bone

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oh hi, i'm an idiot, i mean mitt romney

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Why did the blond woman throw a clock out the window? She was going through a bitter divorce, and didn't want her ex-husband's things in her house anymore.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Do you like fishsticks? Ya, me too.

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why was the fork in the wall? Why would a fork be in a wall?

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Whats red, black and brown? My anus after a Friday night

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How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

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A black man walks down a high street and sees a white woman approaching. He bids her good day and they carry on their respective journeys. He then turns around and follows the white woman and rapes her in a dark alleyway, because as we all know, all black men are rapists.

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What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

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asdasdasdasd

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What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

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A black man and a mexican man jump off the empire state building.Who wins? Nobody,suicide is a serious thing and it is depressing to think that the minorities In America would do such a thing to themselves.

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why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car because he was depressed and contemplating suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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