What do Muslims have for breakfast? Corn Flakes.

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What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

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A man and his friend walk into a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H2O." The second man, quite thirsty, says "I would like some H2O too." The second man dies because the bartender is a serial killer and gave the man the hydrogen peroxide he ordered. The first man is killed with a shovel.

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Why couldn't the Mexican man get a job? Because he was dead.

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what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? An invisible carrot!

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If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

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What did Voldermort say to harry potter? i raped you mum last night!

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the WNBA.

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A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

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Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? He is short and finds it difficult getting from place to place.

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If Chuck Norris were to be hit by a train he would die

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

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Sharing means caring, Caring is socialism

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Whats worse than one dead Baby in ten trash cans Getting raped by kobe

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How do you keep an elephant from charging? Ask nicely.

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My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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