What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, because they weren't made. Cupcakes were made instead. Sorry, Muffins.

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Knock knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said who's there? My name is Knock Knock Oh hi Knock Knock, come in

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How do you scare a little boy? You tell him everyone he loves was shot to death by you and then kick his guardian .

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Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

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Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

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What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well he graduated in four years with a degree in chemical engineering. He worked hard all four years in order to keep his scholarship to the university. Now he leads a very successful life and lives in a large house with his wife and two children.

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Why did the Chinese family eat a dog? Because they were poor and starving refugees.

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A black man is driving down the road in a van, and pulls up to a little a girl and says excuse me Miss. The girl replies Ok Ok I will get the car just dont hurt me The black guy says I dont want you to get in my van im taking your mom on a date.

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What did they do with the drunken sailor? Gave him the sack, which meant he could no longer provide for his family.

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patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

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What did George Bush say when 9/11 happened? "Silly pilots! The airport isn't in a building!"

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Yo momma's so fat that her weight is completely disproportional to the average weight of someone her age.

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A lil girl walks in to a bar........................ all a sudden a giant purple bunny jump up into her butt... now every time she poops its an easter egg hunt. LBall

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What goes up and down but never physically moves? My grade.

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roses are red violets are blue get to close to me ill have to give aids to you!

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What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend? Homeless

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Why did Prius driver go to jail? Because he ran over someone and then fled the scene of the crime (at 11 mph)

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? I don't hammer the watermon

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roses are red violets are blue start sucking my dick or ill kill you

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despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

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Why does the man have mayonaise in his pants? A: I don't know, I was hoping you could tell me.

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Knock, knock. Come in.

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what is your moms favorite website? Wait did I say mom. Oh I'm not very sorry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops