how do you call someone? use a phone

Why did the audience walk out of the movie? Because it had just finished.

A man walked into a bar. He got drunk and left.

Jack and Jill went up the hill....Just kidding, it was only Jill. Jack had no legs

Why doesn't the little boy talk to his mom? Because she smells like barbecue sauce.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

Why did Suzy drop her ball? Because roughly 5 years ago she was part of a car crash violently tearing off both of her arms. Knock knock. Who's there. NOT SUZY!

.why did 6 hate 7 and 8? because they were blocking her from 9!

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand, "Hey! Got any grapes?" The man then realized he was hallucinating because ducks are unable to speak proper english.

what is the difference between the dead baby and the sandwich? i don't put my penis into the sandwich before i eat it.

what's the only thing worse than losing a pen before a test? getting raped by a pedifile. -teagan doherty-

What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

Q why did the kids make fun of timmy A because he was an android with al chunk of metal added accidentally where a real boys crotch would be. Bwilkster

Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he saw his ex-girlfriend walking down the street so he was trying to kill her by hitting her in the head with the clock.

what do mr. potato head and micheal jackson have in common? their noses come off pretty easily

A black man, Jew and a Mexican go camping. A bear wanders into their campsite, but upon seeing them runs away because it's afraid of humans.

Why did I post a joke on this website? Because I felt like it.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychological disorder.

What happened to the boy who crossed the road without looking both ways? He was abducted by aliens.

All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

Why did helen keller's dog run away? He lost track of his destination and got lost.

yo momma so fat dora couldn't even explore her!!!

What's the difference between a goat and a cherry? You can't put a goat on top of your ice cream.

Why didn't Jane text James? Because she was kidnapped.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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