A kid who lost parents is called an orphan and a wife who lost her husband is called a widow. What do you call parents who lost their child? Free on the Weekends.

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How do Germans treat the Jewish? Kindly, and with much hospitality.

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How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

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What do you do if a black man steals your flatscreen TV? Give up, he's probably in Mexico by now.

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why is caleb mears sucha perv? becasuee its calebbbb ahahahahahahah

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How do you describe a cranky rapist? Cranky and rapist

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knock knock whos there? your dr you have cancer

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Lets just say, that I can tell anyone that my brother is one of the top leaders for Interpol (here in the nation we reside in) and that while I do not have the required education to work for interpol, I have connections with them, which allows me to work, well... Yeah, Central.

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You know whats funny about 9/11? Nothing.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead get pulled over. The cop says "Yuck!" Then shoots the redhead because red hair is disgusting.

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An elephant walked into a pub and ordered a strong Vodka and Coke. "Long day?" asked the barman. "Yeah. Very. So many people stroking my trunk in my apartment - It's meant to be a private place. I'm scared to go back there. One child said they were going to rape me."

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Timmy had to use the restroom in class one day, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I use the restroom?" The teacher said, "I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said'," When I was using 'can', I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier for asking for permission, as opposed to expressing ability. I though since you were a teacher you would know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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Why was the little girl crying Someone therew a dump truck at her

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Q: Whats the difference between water melon and a baby? A: Watermelon is a fruit.

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Why did'nt the puppy eat it's food? Because it was made up of little bits and peices of it's family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was playing tic-tac-toe with a friend.

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Roses are red Violets are baskets This joke makes no sence... ... boobs

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree no

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

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Why was the new born on the orphanage's doorstep? He was an accident.

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There are 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and sexy guy. They all work together and have lunch together. The fat guy opens his bag and eats a ham and turkey sandwich. The skinny guy opens his bag and eats a tuna sandwich. The sexy guy opens his bag and eats an egg sandwich. The fat guy finishes his meal. The skinny guy saves half for later. The sexy guy ate more than half of his food. A genie magically appears. The End

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A child walks into a bar. He finds to find his dad passed out in his vomit, the bartender realizes the dad left the kid in the car, and he is arrested. The kid grows up traumatized by the experience, and becomes a substance abuser just like his dad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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