What's green, little, and eats rocks? A Little Green Rock-Eater What's green and has a thousand wheels? A lawn, I lied about the wheels! If I were to throw a rock down the a whole in the center of the earth (straight through) what would happen? The Little Green Rock-Eater would eat it!

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

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What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

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How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

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did you know helen keller had a dog? neither did she....

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what did the food critic say when he was handed a snickers? I'm allergic to peanut butter

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

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I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

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How many mathematicians does it take to count?

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Where did Sarah go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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What did the Taliban teenager strap on his chest before getting on the bus? A blue rubber dildo.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

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Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

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What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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That was totally mean! I mean I was in no way going to say any of that to you! Especially not the last part, sorry that must have been part of the suggestion or something, I barely ever tell myself stuff like that, I mean stop it okay? I mean I totally read it and all but I was all like "I am notnot typing that" please stop it, its humiliating.

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What did the Muslim say to the Jew? Nothing, as he has been deaf since birth and is incapable of forming coherent speech.

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Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

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Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

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There are 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving? The police.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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