How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

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Best reaction to Anti-humor joke me: whats green and has wheels Friend: idk Me: Grass i lied about the wheels Friend:wow dick

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What's the difference between a jew and a bottle of ketchup? People actually like ketchup.

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Why did helen kellers dog committ suicide? You would to if you had massive clinical depression.

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Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

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Seriosly. too much sex again?

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Q: What did the Jewish man say to the Muslim man? A: Hello, how are you today? Nice weather we're having, isn't it?

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Why did Maggie shit herself? Because she saw her son.

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Your mom is so fat that she has trouble walking up the stairs because she gets easily winded.

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What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

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A black person and a white person decide to have a race. Who won? The white person Don't be a racist.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why did the German burn the Jew? Because he dropped his tea.

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How can you tell if your roomate is gay? If he gets an erection when you have anal sex with him.

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How do you know if an elephants been in your fridge? It's completely destroyed.

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Q: if it takes a week to walk a fortnight how many pounds of oranges can you fit in a grapegruit. A: None, because there is no bones in ice cream

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What did the blind man say to the mentally challenged man when he bumped into him? Watch where you're going, retard.

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Richard Gere has a girlfriend called Goldie

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Why is did the blonde cross the road? She was trying to catch the chicken.

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Look down at your keyboard. Notice that U and I are together? <3 Also notice that J and K are together too!:P

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Even dyslexic people attend church and pray to Dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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