How can you make sure your friend wont die of cancer? Decapitate him

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You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face. The horse replies, neigh.

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Who the hell is Femi Otedola?

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steve walked into a bar, what happened next? A: He fell down.

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Why did the black man have a gun in his hand? He was crossing through a dangerous neighborhood and was offering protection to himself and his family.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can not rhyme, Show me your tits

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How many blond girls does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, it is a faily simple task

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? Years of slavery.

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yo momma is so stupid she went and got her self checked for mental retardedness and it turns out she happens to be autistic.

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Jack wasn't nimble. Jack wasn't quick. Jack sat on the candle and burned his corduroys.

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A buddhist walks up to a hotdog stand asks the server to make him one with everything

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was playing tic-tac-toe with a friend.

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Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

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The Labour Party.

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yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

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a white guy, a black guy, and a latino guy all walk into a bar. The white man explains how his family is in turmoil because of his alcholism, the black guy shares his affection for crack, and the latino man explains why he shouldnt be here due to illegal immigration. They all hate their lives. Quack

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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What did the little boy say to a stranger? Nothing. He is very shy, and his parents always said to never talk to strangers.

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A gay man goes out with a butch lesbian and develops a loving relationship, years later they get married and have kids, adopting them from the local orphanage and lives happily ever after.

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What did the plane say to the world Trade Center on 9/11? Nothing a plane is an object therefore cannot talk.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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Myth: Everyone but redheads has a soul. Fact: No one has a soul.

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Why did the jew go to the doctors? Because he had a severe headache.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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