"Ask me if I'm a tea pot" "Are you a tea pot?" "No" Try this on your friends

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Why does everybody hates Justin Bieber? Just leave that girl alone!

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

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A man and a cucumber walk into a bar. They sit three seats away from each other and intermediately give nervous looks to one another. Finally the man stands up and declares "I hate bar jokes" and walks out.

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A man wakes up after only one hour of sleep due to his insomnia. He starts to cry because his wife just passed away and his parents were recently killed in a car accident. The man gathers his composure, takes a shower, and drives to his minimum wage job. He was expelled from high school for an assault he didnt even commit and has no money to get an education. At work, he accidentally drops a box of valuable, fragile electronic parts and gets fired by his boss. He goes home to his dirty 1 bedroom apartment and contemplates suicide. He decides to wait as his favorite tv show is on. He turns on the tv to the news his show has been cancelled. The man, depressed, suicidal and alone, picks up his .22 and kills himself. There is no God.

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What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

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What do you get when you cross a dog with a cat? Nothing, it is impossible to mix 2 different animals

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with more information. Your wife died during the delivery.

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What did the boy reading a book do? He finished the book and took it back to library.

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Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

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There's an african american, a latino, and an asian man riding in the car, whos driving? Obciously one of the three

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What did batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Q: I have a bed, but never sleep, I have a mouth, but never speak. What am I? A: Stephen Hawking

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We are few Nero, too few, if I want to split my money with you, would it help you find true happiness?

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A duck walks into a bar, clearly ignoring the 'No Ducks Allowed' sign that had been placed in the window to prevent comedic scenarios.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? The pilot. You racist.

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What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

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What did the deaf girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was Jewish

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You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

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bob lost his camouflage bag. he never found it.

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A guy walks into a bar. No one notices he has epilepsy.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The other color on our flag is white I'm an American and rhyming doesn't matter

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Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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