what happened when the shoe turned into a shoe.......... nothing, it was a raisin

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What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

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View Terms of Service

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Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

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So yesterday i walked into a bar, so what?

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Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? Velcro.

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So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

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Q. What did the blond say when she woke up? A. I don"t know. I wasn't there.

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What did the clock say to the book? I have no batteries.

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Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

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If a tree fell in the forest, and no one was around to hear it, would you like a cupcake?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting cow wh- SHUT UP!

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Knock Knock Who is there? Orange Orange who? Orange-Banana

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She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

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What did the T Rex say to the pterodactyl? ROIRWR!!!

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why cant little timmy ski? he was born without legs.

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What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

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A man wakes up after only one hour of sleep due to his insomnia. He starts to cry because his wife just passed away and his parents were recently killed in a car accident. The man gathers his composure, takes a shower, and drives to his minimum wage job. He was expelled from high school for an assault he didnt even commit and has no money to get an education. At work, he accidentally drops a box of valuable, fragile electronic parts and gets fired by his boss. He goes home to his dirty 1 bedroom apartment and contemplates suicide. He decides to wait as his favorite tv show is on. He turns on the tv to the news his show has been cancelled. The man, depressed, suicidal and alone, picks up his .22 and kills himself. There is no God.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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A man and a cucumber walk into a bar. They sit three seats away from each other and intermediately give nervous looks to one another. Finally the man stands up and declares "I hate bar jokes" and walks out.

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Potassium? K.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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