Today i decided to burn calories, so I grabbed my lighter from the counter and put it in my pocket and proceeded to the treadmill.

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What haircut did Timmy get at the barbershop? He didn't, he saved money from the barber by going through chemo.

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Josh Moran sticks CD's up his dick to see how fun it is to give a boy anal.

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what did one apple say to another apple nothing apples cant talk

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A watch and a pair of socks.

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Why did a little boy have a black eye? Because his father is very abusive to him and his sister. They are beaten every dad after the father comes home drunk from the bar because his wife also the kids mother died in a car acciedent 1 month before this. Child abuse is not funny and neither is a dead mother.

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When Zeddie LIttle takes an Unflattering picture, millions of Internet people ask him why he looks Wierd in it. He says, "well, I was having a really tough day that day- my grandpa had just died- and I didn't feel like caring about what I looked like." Either way, he essentially fades into the darkness as the new fad takes over.

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A Christian, a Sunni Muslim, and a Shi'a Muslim walked into a government building. Turns out, they were Lebanese, so this was a normal occurrence. Thus, to draw any humor from it before first taking into account the weaknesses of your own government would be both unwise and unfair.

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Why is the baby on fire? Because there was a gas leak at the day care facility. It would have been a terrible tragedy had a heroic babysitter not come to the rescue.

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Why did single women didn't want any babies for? because of Ice Ice Baby.

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Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree? No

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Why do so many black athletes drive black cadillac escalades? Because it's roomy and they deserve to reward themselves after they put in so much hard work trying to be the best player they can be.

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Why did the snappy dresser take a button off of a coat? To see a button fly! NO YOU IDIOT YOU DID IT WRONG, IT'S SUPPOSED TO ABOUT ABOUT A "BUTTER FLY" OMG YOU DOLT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tennis? Tennis who? Tennis Racket

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the man ask the IPhone to marry him He was smoking weed

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 7 eight 9

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What did modern scientists say to Einstein? Neurtinos travel faster than the speed of light! :)

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock -Who's there Not Sarah

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Knock Knock Fuck off. I am new here. I do not know anyone here.

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what has four legs but cant move? dead dog

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What is invisible and smells like rabbits? Bunny farts.

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You heard now that you can not only bet safe at net casinos, but also win safely? Win safely? The hell does that mean? You mean you could win unsafely before? Like the betting casino crashing after you win a million? Moral: That crap is even less moral than I am ffs! Now they give you like 5000 game bucks free just to get you addicted.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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