Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

Who jumps the highest in basketball? The mascot because he has a trampoline.

You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

Knock knock. Knock knock. Knock knock. I'm hammering nails. Knock knock.

Why did the black dude die? Because everyone must die at some point.

Roses are dead Violets are dead I'm a terrible gardener.

time to spruce up!

What do you tell your friend who has been cheating on his wife? You're a terrible human being, and she deserves better!

Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

Why couldn't the little boy tie his shoes? He had no arms

What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

A horse walks into a bar, the bartenders asks "Why the long face?"

Q: What is better than Vagina? A: Nothing

A man walks into a bar after a hard day of work, and he meets this girl and they really kick it off, so the girl says, "lets go somewhere more, private" and they both go to a more secluded bar that has less decibels of noise.

What's worse than finding a dead baby in a dumpster? Recognizing the baby as your missing child, and finding the corpse of your dead wife next to it.

Person 1. Knock-knock. Person 2. Who's there? Person 1. The doctor. Person 2. The doct-- Person 1. You have cancer and have about three weeks to live.

Do you know what really hurts my feelings? Nerve damage.

There's a Mexican and a black guy in a car... Who's driving? The Cop!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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