Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

Roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, others don't

Ian: Your Mama's so dumb, she tried to commit suicide off a sidewalk. Dan: Yea, and when that didn't work she hanged herself.

What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

knock knock whoses there whose home whoses home who? you

Flowers are colors Love me

Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

What's living, purple, yellow, and green? Nothing.

When is a great time to eat chicken fingers? Never Chickens dont have fingers therefore making it misnamed and impossible to eat them

Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

Three black men walk into a gas station and don't steal anything.

Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

What did the man think as the foul baseball flew rapidly toward his face? Oh man, I thought my tickets were to an NBA game.

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck could chuck as much wood as a wood chuck would if a wood chuck could chuck wood.

What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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