What did the archangel Michael say to Jesus? "Hello, Jesus."

I don't understand what's so bad about a worm in your apple. Just get the proper software to clean it up, or even better, get a PC

whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

How many men does it take to change a lightbulb? One

There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

Why is the bowler right handed? He has no left hand.

A priest and a small child enter a bar. The bartender takes his son back from the priest, paying him $30 for his exemplary babysitting services.

An over weight person is diagnosed with anorexia they used to be fatter

Q: Why does the man smell so bad? A: He doesn't shower

What do you call a white man? A caucasian male.

Knock, knock. MAN: Who's there? ... MAN: Hello? Anyone out there? ... MAN: Must be the wind.

Did you hear the one about Steven Hawking into a bar? I havn't either, but its probably a hoot.

A bear walks into a bar. Everyone evacuates as animal control safely asses the situation.

Why did the boy get hit by a bus? HE didn't. He watched where he was going.

How can you tell if a dog is under your chair? Look under your chair

What's the easiest way to get a cat out of a tree? Call the fire department and allow them to safely reach the cat and properly extract it from the tree while you watch from below.

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have ADD ...

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They then proceed to bake into tasty pastries which are then eaten for snacks or maybe a light breakfast.

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

so today, i was walking along, and i noticed that it was sunny outside.

What do you get when you cross a lawn mower and a rabbit? A dead rabbit...

roses are red violets are blue i killed your family

Q: what is the best way to pick up jewish chicks. A: with a pickup line and possibly a gift such as chocolates or flowers

What happens when a blind man walking crashes in to man that's talking to his gang ? He wakes up in a ditch

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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