If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Probably "Look out for that car," but since he has been deaf since the age of 7, his verbal skills are tenuous at best.

The verification for this post was debatable: "Which of these does not belong?" George Bush Barack Obama Bill Clinton Ronald Reagan Head of Cabbage Answers on a postcard please... [L]

Q: Why is Little Johnny in the hospital with a bullet wound and a broken arm? A: I shot him of his bike.

A black man, Jew and a Mexican go camping. A bear wanders into their campsite, but upon seeing them runs away because it's afraid of humans.

Q:What's worse than watching the show Jersey Shore? A:Nothing.

Why did the dinosaurs become extinct? Because they wanted to.

What happens when a chicken with a goat have sex? nothing.

What's worse than the holocaust? nothing it was a terrible act in history

We are unhappy, unfilled because we cannot complete our dream, it is always about us, then again, is wanting the best for others being selfish?

Why did little Lynn fall of her bike? Because she has no legs.

Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: "There goes my income. I dont know how I'll support my family now, or keep my crops alive."

Why are fish so easy to weigh? Because usually they've been killed, stunned or sedated first.

A seal walks into a club.

Whites black white and red all over? The nazi flag.

NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

what happened to the slut last time she opened her legs. a bee flew in and stung her. turned out she was deathly allergic. she died a painful death.

A guy walks into a bar and laughs. Later, a green, homosexual dinosaur dentist escorts him out to play a houdini banjo.

Whats the difference between a black man and a picnic table? Alot of things

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

what happened to the frog that had a car accident, nothing it's dead

Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

how many baby's does it take to paint a wall?? depends how hard u throw them

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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