Mommy, Mommy, I don't like Daddy! Well leave him on the side of the plate and eat your peas instead!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

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A Finnish guy and a Russian guy go into a sauna. The Russian died.

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Two Mice are sitting on a bridge , one falls down an the other is named Charlotte

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What does a blond do when she stops at a red light? She gets arrested.

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How many amish people does it take to screw in a light blub? None as the amish don't require artificial light

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Why did the boy have pink skin at night? Because he did not put on a sufficient amount of sunscreen that morning. This is also known as sunburn.

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Why was the girl so stupid? She had mental retardation caused my Down Syndrome.

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What did the black guy get on the SATs? Who knows, that isn't a specific person

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Whats worse than a creep? ..... Paul sweeney!

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What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

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Why was the asian boy abused? He got an B in math

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What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

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I want some pudding. but I didn't have my meat. how can I have pudding?

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Guess what? Chickenbuttt hahahah! lolomfg

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Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? It didn't. She did not own a dog.

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How many dead babies can fit in a barrel? 4 1/2

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse does not say anything because its a horse and horses cannot talk.

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How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

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Me: What postion in baseball does a cat play? You: I don't know? What? Me: I don't know i haven't eaten that part yet.

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Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

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Theres an irishman , scottish man and a welsh man on a plane they where going to france

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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