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Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

What's big fat and ugly? A monster

Why did the tourist cross the road? He was sightseeing.

Two guys walk into a bar. They are knocked out and rushe to hospital because the bar was metal.

How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

How do you make a plumer sad? You kill his children.

why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead. why;d the banana fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

Why was Sally angry? Because somebody burned all her clothes

whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

Blonde: Where's the ice? Asian: In the freezer.

the WNBA.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

Knock Knock Who's There? Jehovah's Witness

Yo mama so ugly, she has to work harder than most women to attract men.

If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, she was probably lonely.

The Below statement is an antijoke. The Above statement is a joke.

A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

What did the Golden Retriever say when asked about the meaning of life? woof.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was in a chicken pen.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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