Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

What has straight black lines and is square? A refferee.

What is small, red, and can't fit through a doorway? A baby with a spear through its head. Posted By: Lram

Persond A: A guy blows himself and his family up with a hand grenade Person B: HEY!!! Thats not funny thats how my family died

A man runs into a bar and yells "Ow!!" He is hospitalized due to severe trauma to the head and spine.

Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

Yo mama's so fat that they have to grease the door frame and hold a twinky on the other side to get her through.

Violence is never the answer, its the question... The answer is YES!

Johny got a iphone ipad and a macbook. He bragged to his friend. His friend said, i got an apple.

When I see the Viagra commercial telling you about all the side effects and they say "if you have an erection lasting for more than 4 hours, call a doctor." If I have an erection that lasts that long, I'm not calling a doctor. I'm calling my mom; who I always call when I'm sick.

what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

If life gives you lemons, you're setting up a bad joke

What did the mother say to her son when she saw his report card? I don't know. I wasn't there.

A watermelon, a cherry, a mango, and a peanut are sitting at the table for dinner. They are all eating chicken wings and watching the superbowl between the Packers and the Patriots. What is wrong with the situation? Well two things are wrong, cherry's cannot communicate with peanuts because they speak different languages(obviously). And the patriots fucking suck.

alert("Hello");

A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

I don't get it

A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

A car with four Mexicans drives off of a cliff. What's the bad news? They were my friends.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...