a cat and a duck walk into a pub. the cat enters first and says for the duck to put all of their drinks on his bill. the duck(being a duck)says nothing because ducks cannot speak. therefore the cat shouldnt have been speaking either.

What happens when u mix water and soda? You get watery soda

Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

You're mama's SO stupid that when she applied to college, they were happy to help.

Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have down syndrome, my favorite color is potato

Roses are red,violets are blue,hit me once I will break you to Roses are red,violets are blue,I will kick your ass, as hard as to

How do you make an onion cry? Onions are incapable of crying

When did Dom become so brave? When he made friends

you know why they're called ear wigs, right? cause they go in your ears! then they wig out? no, they kill you.

Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

Jerry Sandusky walks into an Under 21

Knock knock. Who's there? Josh. Lettuce who? I didn't say "lettuce"... I said Josh.

A black man in a hooded sweatshirt is sprinting down a back alley. He is trying to get into better shape by exercising and knows a shortcut to his house.

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

A man walked into a bar. He has been in a coma for six weeks now.

H2O corndogs running around naked CC

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

What is the difference between an Australian and an Ethiopian? One is from Australia the other is from Ethiopa

I put the STD in stud now all i need is U

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

Why do Mexicans always have heart burn? Because the food is spicy.

Polly went out for a fag. Then she was raped.

Gay republicans

Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a classified space mission for N.A.S.A.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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