Why did the chicken cross the road? He was jewish and saw a nickel on the other side

Jesse uses a prescription shampoo called " greasey poop" because he feels like his hair doesnt look greasy enough. He cries himself asleep every night because he wants a slim body like the rest of the cool kids, so he eats his pain away, which digs him an even deeper hole. the life of Jesse zigenbein is quite tragic to say the least. Please donate 10$ to the "eat ourselves to sleep" campaign

Q: Why don't chicken breasts have nipples? A: because if you freeze them, they will pop the package.

Two guys walk into a bar. They have drinks, pay for them, then get into a car crash killing a mom and her daughter returning home from selecting a wedding dress. The wedding is canceled. Rate This Comment 0

One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

Why did the chicken cross the road So he could get back to the farm and lay more eggs

Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

Knock Knock I have a f*cking doorbell you asshole

Your mamma is so fat that she is undergoing strict diet and exercise in order to reduce the risk of premature death due to health complications.

What's worse that getting raped by a frog? That would never occur, as frogs do not have genitalia to commit rape.

Why is Michael J. Fox so go at dance? Because he took lesson as a child

i found the cure to cancer.......AIDS

why does pink turn into blue it doesnt you just get hit by a frigde because you cried whe you got shot several times

A paralyzed guy walks into a bar... Oh wait, he can't.

A blond, brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They find a genie, who tells them each one can have one wish. They all wish for the same thing, to be back home with their families.

Whats grosser then gross? A dead puppy in a barrel. Whats grosser the a dead puppy in a barrel? A dead puppy in two barrels. Created by : go josh or ty :D

What does greg and Ian have in common?

A chicken crossed the road. It was run over before reaching the other side. by fast asleep

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream...?? Because he got hit by a white van

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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