How can you tell if a duck is under your bed? Look under your bed

Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because it saw some food, or because it felt threatened on the side of the road it was already on.

Help, this is an urgent message from the S.S. Obesity. We're sinking; I can't imagine why.

Did you hear about the new XBOX releasing in Mexico. It's called the XBOX JUAN!!!

A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

What's the hardest part of the pizza to eat? The motorbike.

Why are leprechauns so happy? The grass tickles their balls

what's worse than pie? alot of things.

Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

all these jokes are horrible now

Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

Q: What did the dragon say to the other dragon A: Nothing they did'nt exicest.

Why do black people make the best milkshakes? because they use the finest ingredients

What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

Knock Knock Who's there? The KKK, got any blacks?

What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

Schizophrenia will affect over 1.5 million people this year. At least, thats what my flying, albino pet rhinoceros told me.

What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

Why was the dog barking? Because I lit him on fire.

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

Jon walked into a bar. Ouch.

How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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