When life gives you a hamburger, you know you're at Mr. Life's Hamburger Stand on 8th Avenue.

what happened when Bob told a joke? Joe laughed.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

DO U KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD BIRD BIRD, BIRD IS THE WORD? DON'T U KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD? EVERYOBODY KNOWS THAT THE BIRD IS THE WORD! Oh, no i did not know that the bird was the word.

How do you make an electrician cry? Kill his family.

What's clear and smells like alcohol? Probably alcohol, genius.

Why did the alcoholic stumble into a bar? Because he was bleeding profusely and was desperately seeking a telephone to contact the nearest hospital.

How do you make a baby cry? You throw bricks at its face.

What happened when the Mexican put the Popsicles in the fridge? They melted

whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

how do you make a baby cry? you throw a brick at it's face!

What's the difference between communism and race mixing? Zey come for our blood, but drown in zeir ovn!!!!!

A black man approaches a customer service desk and asks for help. He is racially discriminated and receives no help with his problem.

What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

I was gonna make a gay joke but those are insensitive, and gays have feelings like everyone else

roses are red tulips are too, violets are violet, not freaking blue.

Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

What's Red, Smells like Blue Paint, What tastes like the sea, and has been doused in the essence of the 80's? If you can come up with something, don't bother; This is a trick question. The space was to give you time to think. Forget your answer.

What's brown and sticky??? A brown stick

I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

Guy 1: Why did Captain Hook die? Guy 2: Because he wiped his anus with a hook? Guy 1: No, because everyone dies.

what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

If Voldemort was gay who would be his partner? Happy potter

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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