- Anti Joke

What's the best part about having sex with twenty eight year olds? They've reached sexual peak but aren't yet past it. Plus, they still aren't in their 30's.

Donald Trump decided to run for President.

Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

Whats worse than getting a splinter? Taking a shower at penn state

Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Doctor B: Doctor who? A: Doctor Johnson, i'm here to check up on you. How's the medication going? B: It's going well thank you, it's working. A: That's very good to hear. Hope you recover soon. B: Thank you!

Two Texas farmers, Jim and Bob, are sitting at their favorite bar, drinking beer. Jim turns to Bob and says, "You know, I'm tired of going through life without an education. Tomorrow I think I'll go to the Community College and sign up for some classes." Bob thinks it's a good idea, and the two leave. The next day, Jim goes down to the college and meets Dean of Admissions, who signs him up for the four basic classes: Math, English, History, and Logic. "Logic?" Jim says. "What's that?" The dean says, "I'll give you an example. Do you own a weed eater?" "Yeah." "Then logically speaking, because you own a weed eater, I think that you would have a yard." "That's true, I do have a yard." "I'm not done," the dean says. "Because you have a yard, I think logically that you would have a house." "Yes, I do have a house." "And because you have a house, I think that you might logically have a family." "Yes, I have a family." "I'm not done yet. Because you have a family, then logically you must have a wife. And because you have a wife, then logic tells me you must be a heterosexual." "I am a heterosexual. That's amazing, you were able to find out all of that because I have a weed eater." Excited to take the class now, Jim shakes the Dean's hand and leaves to go meet Bob at the bar. He tells Bob about his classes, how he is signed up for Math, English, History, and Logic. "Logic?" Bob says, "What's that?" Jim says, "I'll give you an example. Do you have a weed eater?" "No." "Then you're gay!"

Why did the man kill himself? Because he had a gun

How do you shock thomas eddison? Attatch his kite to his balls.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

PLEASE DONT READ THIS OR YOU'LL BE DIED IF YOU DONT THUMBS UP THIS LIKE POST THIS ON 20 MESSAGES OR YOU'RE BEST MAKE THE MOST OF YOUR LIFE WITHIN THE NEXT 7 DAYS

Q: John gets attacked with a chainsaw, how many stitches does he get? A: None, Hes dead jim

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

whats big and can vibrate after you turn it on? A washing machine.

"Mommy! Look, I found a turtle!" "that's no turtle." "Oh..."

Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles there balls

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says: "I forgot to store nuts for winter, now i am dead."

What's scarier than a ghost? Practically anything as ghosts aren't real.

Why do bats fly in circles? They're mentally retarded.

How many dead babies can you fit in a tire? It depends on the size of the tire.

What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.