how do you make a cat get out of a tree you shot it

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why are stand up comedians called stand up comedians? Because they are standing up while telling jokes, dumby.

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Why did the cow cross the road? He probably saw a delicious looking patch of grass on the otherside.

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I never made a mistake. I thought i did once but i was mistaken

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yo Dawg I heard you like dogs... So I sent yo ass to prison and got an NFL contract

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding two worms in your apple. Whats worse than finding two worms in your apple, the Holocaust. Whats worse than the Holocaust, finding three worms in your apple.

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Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: ‘In silence.

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What's special about an Irish Parachute ? It's made in Ireland.

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knock knock whos there the game __i lost the game__

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A new pair of shoes

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How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, the mystery is how mice can get inside a lightbulb.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? "Get in the car Robin."

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Why did the black man steal an inhaler? Because he was broke and he had asthma.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? The light was red, which prompted the chicken to cross safely.

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what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

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violets are green roses are purple this makes total sense, cheeseburger

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Well, I feel that I've stepped outside my comfort zone.

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A man walks into a bar. He then says "ow".

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Lol, first of all all I watched was something called Chobits many years ago, and while I know what hentai is, I cant say I watch that a lot or not really at all no... A peek but, its just too weird for me, they all look like cute kids with deformed bodies or something. What? You into Nerds now? Why cant I just wear my contacts and look somewhat less alien?

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Anti-Joke is a sticky wicket.

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Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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