An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Not enough

You decide, drink or drive. But don't do all 3 at the same time.

A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says" why the long face". The horse, unable to comprehend English just shits on the floor and leaves

A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

yo mommas so poor she doesn't live in a house

My friend on xbox told me about this cool clan. I went to join but I didn't like to wear the white robes

Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? Because it was summer and the grass had extensive growth, so much so, that it proceeded to spread to his neighbors yard. His neighbor then called HOA, and thus, the unruly grass was taken care of.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

What did the cat say to the chicken? Meow

THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

Flowers are colors Love me

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

Difference between African children and a fat boy? nothing, they're always hungry.

Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

If you are swimming in a tree how many dogs does it take to crack a duck? The answer is 4 because nothing rhymes with orange

Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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