why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

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how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

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What do you call a fake noodle An impasta

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what do u call a joke with no punchline? A non-harmful joke

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A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

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Why do thieves shower before undertaking a robbery? Probably part of their morning routine.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

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How do you make a man cry? you torture him

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Why was 6 afraid of 7. Because 7 was a terrorist

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why did the blue berry cross the road

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse then says nothing because horses cannot talk, only humans can talk.

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Why cant your mom breathe She chockin on my D**K

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a duck was clearing out his apartment when he came across a rat. the rat turned into a genie. 'i will grant you 3 wishes' said the genie. 'whats the catch?' replied the duck 'can i touch your dinkle?'

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So there's this guy, and he's trying to screw in a lightbulb, right? Well, he did it. Hoorah. His wife was proud.

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How many Soviet Russians does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, in Soviet Russia, light bulbs are an unavailable commodity because the tyrannical government has called for a ban on unnatural illumination. A fact which is not lost on Mikhail, the light bulb maker whose wife died because his lack of business caused him to miss payments on his hospital bills.

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Why don't you ever want to greet your friend Jack on the plane? Because your wife cheated on you with him and she is having his baby, if you were to even think about talking to Jack, you'd end up slitting his throat and throwing him off the side of the plane into a crocodile pit where they will make a feast of his body for the next couple days... So just don't greet Jack

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Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

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whats the difference between a black man and a cat? you dont run from a cat

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear, fuzzy wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy had no hair because he had cancer and died 3 weeks later.

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How do you make a clown sad? You kill his family.

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What did the convicted pedophile do to the ten year old boy? He molested him.

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Why did Anakin tell Luke he was his father? Because honest people never lie

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Lebron traveled

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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