A man walks into a bar He's an alcoholic and it's ruining his family

Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear, fuzzy wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy had no hair because he had cancer and died 3 weeks later.

"So, what do you fancy doing tonight?" "Does it matter? We'll end up doing what you want anyway..."

Sally heard a scream in a dark room and went to go see who it was. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally...

Why did the kid get hit by the bus? He was in the road.

10 Mexicans are in a car. Who is driving? 1 of the Mexicans.

Why did the dog die? He was old

whats worse than failing your maths test?

Once, I went to Peru.

How do you get your lawyer to shut up. Hit him with a bat.

Why did hitler cause the holocaust? YOLO

What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

Why was the boy mentally retarded? Because his mother was a tree

Why should you never push a Mexican off a bike? Because he will file a lawsuit against you in the event of an injury.

You arrive in the middle east. What is the first thing that you want to do? Leave

Why can't Chuck Norris die? He can, he's just a normal human being.

You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon.

What did the chair say to the fan? Nothing. Chairs and fans are objects so they do not have the physical ability to talk.

Why did the elephant cross the road? To run away from the angry chicken who was mad that he was slacking off work.

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

Why doesn't McDonald's sell hot dogs? They don't want to advertise for McWeenies.

How do you make a clown sad? You kill his family.

I'm homeless.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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