How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

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what has four legs but cant walk? a dog after anal

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What happened to the boy who ate too much? He got type 2 diabetes

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Q: why did the dog fall down the stairs? A: Because I pushed him down.

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one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only anal because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

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There once was a man called steve, His name was steve

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How do you kill a blonde? There are a variety of methods, but I prefer a fine mix of insecure clowns and pepto-bismol.

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what do you get when you mix peanut butter and jelly? a sweaty black guy

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Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

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What is worse then finding an apple in your worm? Not a lot.

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Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? a terrorist dropped a bomb on him which turned into a transformer, raped him and then burried him inside of his refridgerator

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How does it change many dyslexics to take a lightbulb.

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Q: Hey, ask me if I'm a tree. ".. Are you a tree?" A: No.

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a one fingered leper was sitting one day on the beach playing cards. When a stranger asked to play,hide and go seak. well the oner finger leper licked his invisible finger and said "which ways the winds blowing pete. .-poot-

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What's worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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Whats better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub. They order drinks, then leave without speaking to each other. It was pure coincidence they walked into the bar at the same time. They had no connections to each other, them being from three different countries.

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How can you tell if someone is a global warming alarmist? Their IQ on average is 10 points below normal

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If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call it, they aren't going to come.

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2 gay guys walk into the bar guy #1 say lets get drunk guy #2 says lets get wasted then #1 says... what do they do fall on the floor and do it.

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What do you call an horse? A horse, because horse does not start with a vowel and that would be grammatically incorrect.

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Why does Michael J. Fox have a good handshake? He has a firm grip

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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