A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is tearing his family apart.

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What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

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Why is a four year olds bedroom the hottest place in Texas? Its on fire, like the rest of the state because of a tragic wildfire thats ruining the lives of many people.

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Když si to Nikolas ,dejme tomu že Bihary, you know nuseng.. hahahahaha

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what has wheels and is red. A heart, i lied about the wheels.

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there once was a man, he was old, and he had one wish...do you wanna know that wish? Well i don't know it because he died two seconds ago from a heart attack. Oh Well...

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Person 1:why did the person fart Person 2: wh.... Person 1:shut up I'm not interested any more! Btw person 2 got interrupted

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Why did Bob fall off a cliff? He had an epileptic episode.

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Q: If a hen-and-a-half can lay an egg-and-a-half in a day-and-a-half, how long would it take a peg-legged grasshopper to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle? A: He'd give up.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tennis? Tennis who? Tennis Racket

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Why did Sally dance and record it on Vine? She did it for the Vine

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Why aren't dragons real? Because if any animal were to breath fire (let alone have a gland that produced it), they would cease to live for their necks would scorch from the inside out.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Because 6 was registered as a sex offender

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What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

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Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

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why don't asians use this finger (point at pinky)? because it's my finger.

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Who died first the cow or the cow? The Cow

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Guess what Timmy got for Christmas, Nothing, Timmy has no parents, he's an orphan.

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There once was a boy walking over a railroad track. He got hit by a train. He died.

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What have in common a recently born baby and a quadriplegic blonde person? Both have legs but they cant walk

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My brother found a worm in his apple. I dared him to eat it, so he did. When he tried to swallow, the mashed up worm congealed in his throat, killing him. Later, I found out that the worm had poisonous rectum fluids. I was given the Nobel Peace prize.

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Your mother is so ugly that nobody wants to date her because she is hideous.

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Two Canadian men are sitting in a room. Man 1: Do you know what happens when you shoot a wolverine? Man 2: No. Man 1: It absorbs the bullets, duh. The second man proceeds to go outside with a gun. He returns in a few minutes. Man 1: What did you do with that gun? Man 2: I shot a wolverine. Man 1: What happened? Man 2: It fell over and died. I think you watch too much X-Men.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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