Why are rich guys gay? Because they hang around other rich guys

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Oh please! Come on! Those that got to us where mostly Russians remember? And what where my parents? (if you do not know you might have guessed it by now) I found a guy that looked about the same as me, messed him up and put my jacket on him, I do not die that easily. Anyway, id explain more, but I have been without these fucking painkillers so long that I am talking trash on this stupid site again... Seriously the pain I am used to, but this addiction on painkillers is a bitch... (shedog if censor got a hold on it) But it turns out I cant sleep without them, sleep just does not come anymore, so Ill go get some now. Who are you by the way? I am Nero7, Aka Axel Knight.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the man drop one dozen long stem roses? Because he was hit by a taxi cab

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch"

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Roses are red, and many other colors too.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the therapist say to the other therapist? Your skin looks dry, let me lend you some ointment.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the orange cross half way across the road Because it ran out of juice

thumb_up thumb_down +9

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Red." "Red who?" "Red any good books lately?" Suddenly, the séance lost credibility.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why is elmo sad? He was brutally raped by Dora :D

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Yo' Mommas so poor, She has to ask close family friends and relatives for money so she can feed you.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being black

thumb_up thumb_down +9

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A black man, a gay man, and an Asian woman are sitting at a bar. The black man gets a phone call, and after the call all three of them are excited because they are all friends and the black man just got into a good college.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo "who"? Boo Radley. I live down the street.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Chuck Norris has normal human strength.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what did the crow say do the dead gazelle? - nothing the crow ate it

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops