What do you get we you mix a ginger with gasoline? A forest fire.

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How many fingers am i holding up? none, my hand got blown off in Vietnam

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How do you cure cancer? do i look like NASA?

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What is up, the color blue and has a face? the sky. there is no face.

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What is the difference between Julis Ceaser, and the moon? The moon is covered in rocks and craters, and Julis Ceaser is DEAD

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A horse and a penguin and a kangaroo come into a bar and order drinks from the bartender, who later gets fired for taking acid while working.

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what's funnier than the holocaust. If it happened again.

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A man walks into a store with a faulty washing machine. He provides a valid guarantee receipt at the customer service desk and it is replaced without an issue

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What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

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If you dont see banners here it does mean they are not here. P.S Advertising helps fill our pockets and annoy you. Please be understanding in the fact that we will permaban you while grinning if you refuse to UNDER-stand our rule.

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What kind of movies do pirates like? They don't know, Somalia doesn't have much of a film industry.

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A rapist and a little child walk through a dark forest. The little child says: "It's scary here." Rapist answers: "Tell me about, I gotta go back alone through here."

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bite me

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If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

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Urban ghettos

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If your Uncle Jack helped you off an elephant, would you help your Uncle jackoff an elephant? Probably not because it would take more than 3 hands to jack off an elephant P.S. Your Uncle Jack only has 1 hand. Your uncle was on a swing and a clown cut off his hand with an ax

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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Knock knock who's there? Gary Glitter ?_?

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Why is Tommy dead? Because he died.

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Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? An obsession with what motivates a chicken.

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Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a supermarket... They buy food, put in their cars, drive home and cook dinner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops