I took my sick iguana to the Vet. He said why did you bring him to me, a former soldier?

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What do you call a Mexican in the sand? A churro! (not trying to be racist, I'm even Mexican)

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what did Harold Camping say to the little girl and boy? "You and your parents are going to die today"

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Why was a white man mowing his lawn ? The lawn was getting undesirably long which provoked the white man.

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Ruebin is Red, Curtis is too. i think i need a sweaty poo

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What would Jesus say if he was alive today? “Nehwê tzevjânach aikâna d'bwaschmâja af b'arha.”

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name one pop artist who's better than Michael Jackson that's really hard. there's so many

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it was a black guy a white guy a chinese guy a french guy an arab guy an irish guy and a juncky that was too much for a joke

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A man goes to the potty.

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Your mama is so white she helped pay for your education because she wants you to have the best opportunities in life.

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why did the irishman need plastic surgery? because after the bear attack where there used to be a face there is now a gap

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Your momma's so fat she ate oranges and coffe

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what do you call lots of jews on a train? Call them what you want they aren't coming back!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no reason. Chickens don't have the thinking skills to reason.

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Why did the boy wipeout on his bike? An old man threw a snake in front of his tire

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Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

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How did Helen Keller burn the side of her face? She didn't use enough sunscreen.

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What happed when the homeless shelter went out of business? -Everyone went hungry and died.

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Roses are red Violets are violet the last time i saw this poem i couldn't rhyme no more

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Why did the gay man's ass hurt? He has rectal cancer.

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why did the chicken cross the road? he was stapeled to a cow and the cow got hit by a bus so they died.

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There's an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman. They are all trapped in a jail cell. Eventually they all starved to death.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy had stage 4 skin cancer.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops