Mexicans don't use lightbulbs because they can't afford them.

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Justing Bieber walks in a bar. Everyone shoots him.

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- What's better than just sitting on a couch in a summerhouse with a bottle of wine and reading a good book? - An orgy.

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Person 1: I need an adult.... Person 2: I am an adult. Person 1: I need another adult... Person 2: My friend's an adult too. Person 1: I need a third adult Person 2: GOD UR NEEDY!

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

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What did the blond say to the other blond? "I like your shoes."

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What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

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What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

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4501 3346 1687 2292 david0209. never do this.

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In retrospect, I was wrong to microwave all those cats.

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A woman becomes pregnant. 9 months later she has a baby.

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why does pink turn into blue it doesnt you just get hit by a frigde because you cried whe you got shot several times

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Have you ever tried ethiopian food Neither have they

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What did the strawberry say to the elephant? Nothing. Because it's a strawberry and strawberries can't talk.

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How many dead babies can you fit a bathtub??? It depends on how you slice them!

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Why'd the clown fall out of the tree? it died. Why'd the cat fall out of the tree? it died Why'd the chicken fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the clown

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

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What has 389,236,587 arms, has rainbow colored fur, and fornicates on your front lawn? Absolutely nothing. That's pretty much physically impossible.

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Boy:U a dime Girl: she said ur a quarter Boy:-_- dumb B***h

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A man is traveling to the nearest grocery store. He stops at an intersection and notices a another car beside him. It was a black corvet. So he blew it up and the men inside of it as well. He then proceeded to call the cops as to try to cover the explosion up as if it was not his fault. Unfortunately, the police had video evidence of the incident through video surveillance and the man was arrested for life. He never got a second chance in life and eventually died a slow, painful death in the hands of cancer at the age of 91.

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Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

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Salt is brown, Pepper is white, my kitchen is in a mess.

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What is the worst part about dying? no-one cause no-one has ever survived dying to know what it is like so how is it possible that I would know

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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