What do you call a fake noodle An impasta

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a Jew reading a book in the library? Steve Goldberg. .

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Your mom is so ugly- Wait, hold on. How are you born?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: Why did the little girl fall from the swing? A: Because she didn't have arms. Q2: And why did she fall from the swing again? A2: Because she tried to get on it again.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A doctor tells a woman he needs to take her rectal temperature. The woman tells the doctor "That's not my rectum." The doctor promptly apologizes and conducts the rest of the check up.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses Are Potato, Violets Are Booze, Im Irish and i hate Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How did the Mexican got into the USA? Trough the border.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did it take a long time to read the anti-joke? Because of the great amount of space between the question and the answer.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker Face

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No.. Neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Your momma's so fat, people make jokes about her.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Who would win if Chuck Norris and God fought to the death? None they are both fictional.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why couldn't the blond get into the library? Because the library was closed therefore the door was locked.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you get when you mix Lil Wayne and Lil John? A full size John Wayne

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Nebraska the farmland its the only place for me!! I love the corn and the corn loves me!! I live for the corn and the corn lives for me!!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Two cows are sitting in a bathtub. One cow says please pass the soap. The other cow says nothing, cause it's a cow, making it incapable if speech. The other cow was just a guy in a cow costume.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A boy grows up loving tractors. For birthday and Christmas each year he got a tractor toy of some kind, until the age of 17, when he finally gave up tractors and got himself a CD player. One day, listening to all the latest tunes with some headphones, he looks outside to see his neighbour's house on fire. He goes outside to find firemen trying to put out the blaze. He jumps into the blazing house and inhales as much as he can, which astonishingly puts out the blaze. A fireman confusing asked "How did you do that?" The boy replies, " I'm an ex-tractor fan."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's up? Up Adverb: Toward the sky or a higher position. Preposition: From a lower to a higher point on (something); upward along: "I climbed up a flight of steps". Adjective: Directed or moving toward a higher place or position: "the up escalator". Noun: A period of good fortune. Verb: Do something abruptly or boldly: "she upped and left him". Synonyms: adverb. upward - upwards - aloft - above - upstairs - overhead preposition. on - upon - over - along - with adjective. rising noun. ascent - rise - upgrade verb. raise - enhance - increase - lift - rise

thumb_up thumb_down -8

There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: What should you do when life gives you lemons? A: Life would never really give you lemons...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Traffic was too backed-up so the chicken took a different route.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

One early Christmas morning i went downstairs. My mother told me that she had gotten me the ultimate stocking stuffer. It was a foot

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops