a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Have you ever seen the movie called "The Tourist"? No

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Q. What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? A. An ambulance due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

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Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

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why did the man shave his balls cause they were unnecessarily hairy

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

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What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

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What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

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Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

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A man told his daughter not to give his dog coffee. His daughter turned and told him that she was his nurse and his alzheimers is getting worse.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, No, violets are VIOLET, That’s why they’re called “violets.” Edmund Spenser was an idiot.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

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Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

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What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? All of them.

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If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

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Q: What do you get when a black man dates a white lady? A: A perfectly acceptable relationship.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

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Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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