How do you call leprechaun with leprosy? Sick.

Jesus Christ

How do you cheat your friend up Throw a BRIC at her face.

what did the ghost say to the bee boo-bee

Science fact: what would happen if you lined up all the veins in your body? You would die.

Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

how many flys in a box six --sticksack

How much does Michael Vick love his dogs? More than Casey Anthony loved her daughter.

A man walks into a bar. His crippling alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

What do you call a fake noodle An impasta

A Chinese man, an Italian man and a French man are sitting in a plane. They arrive in Los Angeles with a 23 minute delay due to atmospheric conditions

What does 10 dead babies in a microwave look like? I dont know. I was too busy masturbating.

Lol, first of all all I watched was something called Chobits many years ago, and while I know what hentai is, I cant say I watch that a lot or not really at all no... A peek but, its just too weird for me, they all look like cute kids with deformed bodies or something. What? You into Nerds now? Why cant I just wear my contacts and look somewhat less alien?

whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

*Knock Knock* Who's there? "Justin Bieber" And you let him in because he's a young talented singer.

What did the homosexual get for Christmas off his boyfriend? A lovely present off his loving partner.

How did the the the police know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head & shoulders in the glove compartment.

whats worse than finding a dead cat in your kitchen? a dead cat in your bedroom

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

A doctor tells a woman he needs to take her rectal temperature. The woman tells the doctor "That's not my rectum." The doctor promptly apologizes and conducts the rest of the check up.

What did the black man get for Christmas? Presents

Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

Why is Michael Jackson bad at chess ? Because he is dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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