Have you heard about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problems out with a pencil... It was a #2 pencil

give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

how do stick a dead baby into a blender and why???????? feet first so u can see the reaction on top.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And so are you But the roses have wiltered The violets are dead The sugar bowl is empty And so is your head

Dr.Octagonapus.... BLAAAAAArGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jackalope :)

A man walks into a bar and sees another man crying at the other end he asked what's wrong the man replies well its a long story I have time replyed the other man ok well me and my wife are always arguing. So I divided to go to the library after hours of reading I see a book about history and as im reading it its time to go home and when I was going to check it out I forgot my library card I get home and me and my wife make up and have a baby thats not bad at all said the other man yea you've never lost ur library card

What's worse than the Holocaust? ........finding a worm in your apple.

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Why was the little girl sad? She had a grown man sexually assault her.

A black guy and a Hispanic guy are in a car together. Who's driving? The black guy.

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Q: How did the man walk across the road? A: With his own 2 feet!

A blond is walking down the street when she is suddenly mugged and raped. She reports her attacker but he is never found.

So an Alex Gedrose walks into a bar, and orders peanut butter and jelly toast on buttermilk with extra Linda on the side.

why didn't bob die? because he liked his hair just the way it was.

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

What is worse than finding an apple in you worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

Why didn't Rosa Parks get her fat black ass up? Because she was an avid partier and had anal with roughly 8 different guys the night before.

What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? A vet.

What did Hitler get his son for Christmas? An Ez-bake oven and a GI Jew

mitchell palmer sucks

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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