"Torture the orphans as much as you want. Who they gonna tell? Their parents?"

Why did the Polish man cross the road? Because the doctors was across the road, and he had a doctor appointment in five minutes time.

Someone just commented on my joke! ... oh wait it was myself

Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

Why didnt the vampire have a reflection? You have to be real to have a reflexion

johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead

Q; why did the German ask the Jew to go in his shower? A; because the Jew had stayed the night at the Germans house.

What did the grizzly bears have for lunch? Fish and tourists.

Why did the pirate get kicked out of the pirate movie? He killed 7 people while looking for treasure under the seats.

John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

Why did chuck norris die Brain tumor

What's black and white and red all over? I don't know I asked you

Kid: "Tell me about when you were young, Grandpa." Grandpa: "Oh, sonny, those were crazy times. My friends and I were out of control. We used to give each other wet-willies and funny arm. We'd play dandy-balls and legs-a-spread and penis-butt." Kid: "Sounds kind of gay, Grandpa. " Grandpa: "It was gay. Everyone was. But, back then, we were called pole-fancies. It was real, good old-fashioned "grab the nearest tree and hold on for dear life" gay, not today's fancy, featherbed, thread-count gay. People got hurt back then! Kid "That's gay." Grandpa: "Yeah, it was pretty gay "

Who comes up with terrible jokes and then mentions the name of the person they are talking about like a bitch? Both of us, Dylan.

Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water? A: It'll take a while for me to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick(: hahah.

What's worse than rotten eggs? Being dead.

What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I actually take my shoes off when I jump on the trampoline.

What is a mean thing to say to Stephen Hawking? Please take a seat.

How do you tell the difference between a politician and a reindeer? A politician is an employee who works under a strict firm of a government department while a reindeer is a large, grazing ungulate in the family Cervidae that is native to subarctic polar regions of North America.

Why is my penis so small? No, seriously, can anyone tell me?

What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

What is worse than getting shot in the leg? Getting shot in the head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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