You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends nose. But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

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Q: What do you call a person with no arms and no legs ??? A: Stumpy

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Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

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Q-if you are what you eat ,does that make you cannibal? A- yes

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

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What's black, white, and red all over? Road Kill Penguins.

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what did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? "Grggglgluglguggarglegerrrllggglge"

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Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and not being funny.

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What did Hellen Keller say when she drove up to the stop sign? Nothing, she doesn't drive.

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What happened to the baby seal who went clubbing? He met a nice woman and contracted HIV from her after engaging in unprotected sexual intercourse after taking her to his flat.

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Three bitches walk into a bar, and die

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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They say laughter is the best medicine but i've always found it hard to laugh at cancer.

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Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

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Why did the cave men discover fire? They were the only humans on earth.

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Person 1: knock knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: nobody Person 2: nobody who? Person 1: ............

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Q: What do you call a pig with wings? A: Pigs don't have wings.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? it had vaginal warts

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Q: What's white and sticky? A: Glue.

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Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

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Bugsys back back back again with a brand new track cumming on megs back back back with a new boxing cap cap cap, stealing millions from banks having a wank coz hes a lanky cockney mong

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Postman Will you sign hear please he said Oh my toaster came

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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