What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

Q: How do you make Osama Bin Ladin happy? A: Take him out to a nice seafood dinner free of charge.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to commit suicide through vehicular manslaughter and knew that the average human being would not be able to stop before it was too late.

What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

Why did Steve Jobs die? Because he had cancer

Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

What is the worst thing to say to a dying person? After you die I'm going to defile your corpse, nan.

Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

I had vodka + water and got drunk. had rum + water and got drunk. had gin and water and still got drunk. I've learnt my lesson. NO MORE WATER FOR ME

Dick Cheney That's the joke

what do u call a kid at school a school kid and i have enough of these anti jokes they are not funny

How do you entertain a bored pharaoh? (written in 1600 BCE - Westcar Papyrus) -You sail a boatload of young women dressed only in fishing nets down the Nile and urge the pharaoh to go catch a fish

woman's rights

What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

America's Got Talent WIN! Britian's Got Talent WIN! Mexico's Got Talent WTF!

What's funnier than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? Nothing, infant mortality is not a laughing matter.

Why did the chicken cross the road I don't know

wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

A black man walks into a KFC, he then realizes that he is in the wrong store, and walks out.

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo "who"? Boo Radley. I live down the street.

A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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