How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

i put a oie in the oven, it baked

Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

So a man walks into a bar, right?

Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

why did the baby fall down the stairs? i pushed it.

You wanna hear a clean joke? Mary takes a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is a man.

One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

Killing your friend as a joke.

AAAnd that did not totally send a rush of sweet endorphin's up my spine, I think myself of as really really blunt, I value individualism rather than complete assimilation, I think that, if people want to hear my opinion, they ask me, and if they want to hear what they want to hear, they can ask... Pff, anybody else. I end up insulting a lot of people literally asking for it, but moments like these make it all worth it. I am also extremely superstitious, the catchphra states "Grain of salt" so I wont take your comment completely... I am just screwing around...

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a car and died

Why did the chicken cross the road? For a legitimate reason

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Red." "Red who?" "Red any good books lately?" Suddenly, the séance lost credibility.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

what did the cat say to the potato? meow

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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