Q: why did the black guy die? A: he got shot

What's worse than getting a apple and finding a worm in it. Getting hit in the face with a meteorite.

Yo momma so ugly, except she's not. She's looking beautiful today.

Why did the chicken cross the road? ... So he didn't get Mono from Janelle.

What's worse than finding a fly in your soup? Being raped... What's worse than being raped? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two flies in your soup

Your mom says hi!.........Jinks!!!! yeah yeah yeah yeah yeaaaah.

How come Helen Keller didn’t scream when she fell off the cliff? Because at 19 months she contracted an illness that left her blind and deaf and therefore never learned to properly use her vocal cords

Women's Rights

What happened when Tim's house caught on fire? The fire department was contacted and they put the fire out.

Why didn't Suzie answer her mother? Suzie has a serious condition where she is mute and also severely deaf.

A dog walks into a bar, the bartender asks, "why the long face?" The dog replies, "because I am a dog you idiot, my face always looks like this"

What is better than a 50-inch wide plasma flat screen TV? A 51-inch wide plasma flat screen TV.

On Friday the 13th,My cat turned into a dog.

Q. what did the hobo say to the rich guy A. nothing the hobo wa a mute

A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

Why are you a chicken? Because I say cock-a-doodle doo

ok there is 3 people and the white kid says "bet i got a better dick than all of you" he pulls it out and then the mexican says "nope got you beat" and then the black guy says "nope got all you beat look" and then the mexican and white guys say "its because your black" so the black guy goes home and tells his mom wht happen and ask " is it true mines bigger because im black?" she said " no it bc your 23"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111

Why did the white policeman shoot all the black people in a house and not the white people Because the black guys were holding the white guys hostage

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I just sharpened this hatchet Don't make me use it!

How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

How Dow you make a baby stop crying?? Hit it with a brick By smash45

How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

knock knock whos there i dont know. go look

What did the girl tell her abusive boyfriend Girl: You broke my heart! Boyfriend: I'm gonna break your face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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