A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What's worse than a bug in your soup? Getting shot in the stomach.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why doesn't the man like iced tea? Because he likes it hot.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What's a foot long and slippery? A slipper.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A man once went duck pin bowling, 5 years later he died of leukemia.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

thumb_up thumb_down +31

what is black and white and read all over? a bankrupt newspaper that cannot afford color ink because the accountant misplaced company funds.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

thumb_up thumb_down +31

saftey torch you can out it on the porch. saftey torch put it in the hallway. saftey torch scare the monsters away. saftey torch that'll be 50 bucks.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red OMFG MY LAWN IS ON FIRE !!!?

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

thumb_up thumb_down +29

what's worse than people who aren't funny? ryan vallee

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Penis

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A: what did one apple say to the other apple. B: Nothing apples cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down +29

why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

thumb_up thumb_down +29

what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the girl blush when she opened the fridge? Because she saw the salad dressing

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops