What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? Nothing... he looked him up and down and spat at him instead.

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A Haiku It Is This One Is Kind Of Boring Now It's Time For Bed

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Why was the boy afraid? Because he had just seen his dog get ran over by a tractor

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What is a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

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The new Minons film reminds me of most foreign films.. You can't undertand a fucking word they say and they're all yellow

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What's eighteen inches long, stiff, and makes women scream at night? A twelve inch long penis that is erect, thus adding approximately one half of its flaccid size, and involved in the act of fornication with the female partner of the man whose penis I am describing. (Of course, it is ignorant and juvenile to assume that the man in question is heterosexual. He may be a homosexual, which is perfectly acceptable in these liberal times we live in, or he may in fact be single and not inclined towards a sexual preference of any kind. This is understandable due to the myriad complications of long-term relationships, a result of the infinite differences between the masculine and feminine psyches.)

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Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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How did the mouse die It was eaten by a cat How did the cat die It jumped into the bathtub and drowned

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whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

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Why didn't Sammy Robertson make the world series catch to win the series in 1977? Because Sam, like many many discouraged teens in America, didn't follow his life long dream and later became a janitor at his hometown middle-school.

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Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers who are you?

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why did the chicken cross the road ? how else is he going to get to the other side

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There once was a man from Madrass Whose balls were made out of brass This was incredibly uncomfortable and embarrassing for him. It also affected his sexual potency and rendered him infertile, Which drastically affected his ability to enter and sustain relationships with women.

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Why does the cow eat grass? A: Because it's green. (Cows are colorblind)

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having a giant, angry ape on steroids rip your heart out and eat it before your eyes as you painfully die from the unbearable pain and rapid blood loss.

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Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

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How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

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"Seriosly" You got a life buddy? Are you okay? Cant you see that I am totally rocking out on my imaginary air guitar which is now inside your mind? No you are not okay! Moral: YOU ARE NOT OKAY SPREAD THE WORD! INFORM THE WORLD! YOU ARE NOT OKAY! Moral2nd: "Seriously" though dawg, you cant keep watching over me all the time, I mean you I smell the hypocrisy, but are you guys AAAALWAYS HERE? DO NOT REPLY! WE REPEAT, DO NOT REPLY!rq

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What do you call a black man with a small penis? Aids free

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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