I hate it when people pour my cereal. They don't know how much I want. They don't know my life. They don't know what I've been through.

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

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I asked her where you were.

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An Irishman walked out of a bar

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How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

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Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

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a blonde walks in to a bar, the bar tender gives him a free drink because he's a man and it's nazi germany

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So this chick meets a guy at a bar. They never greet each other and the drive home sober.

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Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

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what's blue , and you can urinate on it ? a rim block.

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Knock knock... Home invasion

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All I can say is that its not the feds, and not Interpol nothing "legal" nor anything belonging to the state as far as we can tell. You all stay locked up, and I will make sure this little geek with shitty breath does not say anything about you, as for the rest, I cant say much.

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Knock Knock Who is there? *bang* The following story depicts the life and death of Bob:___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________then he opened the door and was shot in the face.

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Why was the boy in front of the adoption center sad? He lost his lolly-pop.

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so if your riding down a big hill in your canoe and your bicycle falls out how many pancakes do you have left? you would have 200 pancakes left --sticksack

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My captcha thing says "hulk smash" lol bahahahahahahaha, k

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

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How do you stop a baby from spinning round a washing line. Hit it in face with a baseball bat.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

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Whats gayer then dancing with the stars? Justin beiber

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Those who believe that Sarah Palin is dumb are living in some fantasyland. She could damn well speak as much as anyone else!

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A man is standing on the street corner waiting for the bus. As it pulls up he steps on and pays his fare while he whistles to his iPod.

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A man walks into a bar. Since he was only moving at a slow walking pace, he was fine, no further events worth noting occured.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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